Work Hazard: Flying Objects.

Seen recently at the gym: One employee, standing halfway up the staircase to the second floor, threw a stability ball at an unsuspecting co-worker. Unsuspecting co-worker recoiled in pain as the ball bounced off the back of his head. The assassin triumphantly bellowed "Oh snap" through a crowd of customers who stood wide-eyed in stunned silence. Unsuspecting Co-worker proceeded to repremand Staircase Assassin loudly with a string of expletives (and rightly so). Satisfied that victory was his, Staircase Assassin ignored U.C.'s tirade and turned away. But without warning, Unsuspecting Co-worker unleashed a devastating counterstrike by throwing a shoe at S.A.'s face.

In a shocking display of audacity, S.A., in obvious pain, complained that this retaliation was unjust. After a heated exchange about which makeshift missle was more damaging, it was determined that science would resolve the dispute. Exchanging original positions, U.C. threw the stability ball at S.A. Unfortunately, U.C. proved to be significantly less accurate with a stability ball than with footwear. He succeeded only at grazing S.A.'s head, but did score a direct hit on a nearby customer. In the interests of preventing further collateral damage, the physics experiment was suspended indefinitely. Future customers should note that hostilities might resume at any time.