Through the fog . . .
Today it came to my attention that an interesting event occured at the gym this weekend. A customer was in the men's steam room shaving his balls. I shit you not. Another customer objected to this and informed one of the desk attendants on duty. The desk attendant then confronted the shaver, who denied the accusation. The d.a. tried to reason with him, noting that "there's a time and a place for everything, and this is certainly not the place". The customer only offered more denials.
This incident raises several questions. First, and most obviously, What The Fuck? Second, although this customer has a lengthy history of bizarro behaviour (upon which more at a later time), and everyone assumes he is guilty, the denial seems inconsistant with the crime. It occurs to me that a public ball shaver would be unaware that this is massively antisocial behaviour, and so would not deny doing it. Denying the offense is indicative of knowledge of wrongdoing. There are alot of things one might do even though one knows they are wrong - robbing a bank, cheating on a test, etc. But shaving your balls in public? It baffles the mind. There must be an answer to this, but I am afraid to try thinking about what it is. Denial makes public ball shaving even worse, if that's possible.
Third, is the accusing customer making it up? Ordinarily, I would dismiss this option out of hand. Who would falsely accuse someone else of shaving their nuts in a steam room? But at the gym, nothing seems impossible. I will look into who the accuser is. Fourth, should there have been an investigation? And by investigation, I mean should the d.a. have demanded to see the customer's balls? If the customer were innocent, it would be the easiest way to prove it. And hell, this guy walks around the locker room naked all the time, so why not? Refusal would've surely been an admission of guilt. One could also look through the trash cans for a pile of pubes. I assume he did not leave the evidence at the scene of the crime, although he could've taken it with him. Which of course is also too weird to think about.
This incident raises several questions. First, and most obviously, What The Fuck? Second, although this customer has a lengthy history of bizarro behaviour (upon which more at a later time), and everyone assumes he is guilty, the denial seems inconsistant with the crime. It occurs to me that a public ball shaver would be unaware that this is massively antisocial behaviour, and so would not deny doing it. Denying the offense is indicative of knowledge of wrongdoing. There are alot of things one might do even though one knows they are wrong - robbing a bank, cheating on a test, etc. But shaving your balls in public? It baffles the mind. There must be an answer to this, but I am afraid to try thinking about what it is. Denial makes public ball shaving even worse, if that's possible.
Third, is the accusing customer making it up? Ordinarily, I would dismiss this option out of hand. Who would falsely accuse someone else of shaving their nuts in a steam room? But at the gym, nothing seems impossible. I will look into who the accuser is. Fourth, should there have been an investigation? And by investigation, I mean should the d.a. have demanded to see the customer's balls? If the customer were innocent, it would be the easiest way to prove it. And hell, this guy walks around the locker room naked all the time, so why not? Refusal would've surely been an admission of guilt. One could also look through the trash cans for a pile of pubes. I assume he did not leave the evidence at the scene of the crime, although he could've taken it with him. Which of course is also too weird to think about.
posted by Deskie at 8:03 PM
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